Monday, March 7, 2011

There are no words ...

This is a little on the personal side and may be difficult for some to read, so I apologize and warn my readers in advance ......

Last week was a rough week for me. I had two last-minute shoots pop up that really affected me on both a personal and professional level ... one last family shoot for a heroic dog (that blog will come soon) and a shoot that words can't even begin to describe - a sleeping angel.

I received a call early last Friday morning from a friend of mine, explaining that one of her good friends had lost her full-term baby and she asked me to come to the hospital (with the family's permission), to come capture a few moments with their child. I knew that if the situation were reversed, I would want someone to do this for me - my heart absolutely broke for this family, and of course I knew I had to go, no matter what. I talked with a few of my photographer friends and with their encouragement, I looked up sites like Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep so I could grasp what I was going to do for this family - I have never done anything like this before and knew it wouldn't be like any other shoot I've ever done in the 15+ years I've been behind a camera.

It's an hour of my life that really - I think changed me, both personally and professionally. I had never met these two wonderful, warm-hearted people before ... but I went and took some pictures of their beautiful baby, them holding him, his tiny little fingers. I cried nearly the entire time, cried with them, silently praying for strength and healing for their family. I was there not as Ashley the photographer - but as Ashley the human, the woman, the mother, and I think that it shows through the pictures. It was entirely new way of looking through the lens.

My heart is still aching from that short hour with this family and they are in my continued prayers ... I am forever changed as a mother and photographer after this shoot. It was definitely one of the hardest things I've ever done - ever - but I hope that what I was able to do will help their family heal.


  1. This i so sad Ashley and i am so Proud to call you a friend. My heart breaks for this Family.


  2. What you did for them will help them heal and also help them remeber the little one. Thank you for doing this for them. I know this family and its hard, very hard for them but this will help them. Bless you for doing this.

  3. Oh Ashley... I'm sure this must have been tough. As a mother I couldn't imagine going through that, or being able to take pictures. You're a great person.

  4. What a great thing you did for this family Ashley. Because of you it will help them heal and always remember their baby no matter what.

  5. Ashley..I'm so proud to call you my friend! I can't even begin to imagine the magnitude of the emotions you were feeling! I ♥ you!

  6. Ashley, after I read this I just cried & cried & cried... I know how it is & the words can't describe it.

    I'm so proud of you being there for them & being a strong person.

    The baby is now in God's hands. He will be well taken care of. The baby knows his daddy & mommy love him so much.

    Thanks for sharing & I will pray for them.

  7. Thank you so much again Ashley for doing this. I know it will help them with their healing process and they will have some beautiful photographs to remember their sleeping angel.